I am excited about the new year and I plan to have 2024 be my best year yet for fresh air and exercise. Yes, you are still reading FINNICKY. Although this reminds me of past New Year resolutions, I am ready to give the great outdoors my all. Once again. January is usually a very athletic month.
When I was in Florida in addition to the beach, I satisfied my January enthusiasm at the State Park. For $15 I was able to rent a bike and pedal through endless acres of pristine wilderness. Occasionally, I would spot a deer and deliberately I avoided the alligators. No reptile was going to spoil my day in nature. Unfortunately, alligators were everywhere because Florida is, well, . . . it is swampy. The Park offered a paddle boat ride on a small lake but because of the you-know-what, I never went. The water excursion boat was called The Gator Gal.
Staying far from the lake and remembering a cute cat video, I was able to bike for miles with a smile. The video showed a boat ramp with a gator’s ugly reptilian head coming out of the water, his body submerged. At the edge of the ramp and sitting directly in front of the alligator’s nose was a cat. The cat and gator were motionless until the cat slowly raised its paw and hissed. The gator backed down into the water. Take that gator.
I enjoyed the Florida State Park and its vast expanse of untouched land. The open country was similar to bike adventures in Arizona, where I would occasionally see a sign - Caution - Wild Horses. Parks do a wonderful job of alerting us to wildlife. What visitor to Yellowstone is surprised by the famous Don’t Feed the Bears signs. (Who would feed a bear?)
One January, in Florida, while ignoring the alligators, breathing the fresh air, and admiring the view, something unthinkable happened. Here is an excerpt from ‘Oh No. I’m Outta Here.’
La de da…happy me biking through the wilderness. Wait! What’s this! Warning—Vultures May Cause Damage to Vehicles. What? Vultures? Those big birds that I see everywhere are VULTURES? Where am I? Hell?
“Get a grip, Miss Pat, enjoy the trees, the vast expanse of pristine land unhindered by man’s overreaching encroachment into God’s creation. Calm down, take a deep breath. Recite a calming poem. Maybe the vultures feast on dead alligators. Now, is that better? - Where’d she go?”
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