Successful Failure

           Ahh April, the month that celebrates both fools and rain. Why limit April Fool’s Day to the first day of the month? Because April is also Tax month, my financial advisor suggested that I write a loser’s handbook, not easily offended, I accepted the challenge. As for April showers bringing May flowers, we’ll have to wait and see.

         The term Born Loser is incorrect. Successful losing takes time, effort, and planning, it is an acquired skill. I enjoyed writing The Loser’s Handbook-An Authoritative Guide to SuccessfulFailure. The chapters: Lose Now-Ten Easy Steps, How to Lose Your Perfect Soul Mate, Financial Freedom and Weight Loss guide readers into the joy of no tax return.

       For a small extra charge, I include my weekly newsletter, I Can’t Find Myself. This dynamic resource provides maps, compasses, travel guides, and keys to help the common loser function in today’s complex world. I am excited to announce that there will be a Lose Cruise in May. Aboard replicas of the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria, the best of relaxation will be combined with intense life-changing seminars.

        The Loser’s Handbook covers multiple topics including family, career, and pets. Here are excerpts which will remind you that April 15th is not the only foolish day in a very wet and wacky month. 

•  Scatter yourself/diversify. This is the Jack of all trades but master of none syndrome. I call it Life ADD. Do some painting, some writing, a little sports.Spread this diversification out over a lifetime and you will find yourself (our goal) not far from where you started.

•  Develop low self-esteem. This is not hard, your friend and family will help you.

•  Write everything down. This is a great waste of time. My handwriting is illegible, and my spelling is incorrect. If you have good handwriting and can spell, you would not be reading this.

•  Misuse words. It’s your language to isn’t it?

•  Never complete

•  Plan. Be a planner, then fail. That way no one can say that you didn’t plan.

•  Don’t watch TV. I have never bothered to waste my time and pollute my thinking.

•  Lead a Healthy lifestyle. This is important if you are to blame yourself and not your crazy habits.

•  Never use the spill chick.

I hope these suggestions have been helpful, and that you will consider joining us for the cruise.

       MAY THE LOSS BE WITH YOU

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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